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Hi guys, happy Friday!

In this blog, just wanted to write a quick message about the way things feel now vs. how they used to feel. Now that I’m not in school and am not focused on learning something, joining a club, or simply having free time in the day to go for a walk, I find myself worried. Worried about big things. Things that I thought I was only going to care about once I was like 30. Well not exactly 30, but I think about things that felt very foreign before. Like buying homes, retirement, the economy, inflation rates, emergencies.

Before, these were things that crossed my mind but didn’t consume the majority of the way that I thought. Maybe this is just being hit with reality, something that I was shielded from at college, because for all those years even though I was technically an adult, I always hid behind the label of “student.” I couldn’t know better, my focus was school, right? And I’m not saying all students are the same, some have definitely been more mature or been more aware while in college. I just have always lived in a bubble. I still do if I’m honest. That is beside the point, though.

I guess I would like to better deal with these overwhelming feelings of dread. Do I get better hobbies? Should I talk to someone? I don’t know exactly what I’m afraid will go wrong in my life. One fear I do have is that I won’t like the life I live. What if in fear of not being prepared for life, I become a person afraid to live it? I would hate to waste away in worry. I miss worrying about what I was going to wear or I had walked enough steps in a day. Maybe I should find something else to do. Something positive. The only thing that I do outside of working out is to take online courses, and that is more out of fear of falling behind for work. I wouldn’t count that as positive. I’ll see.

Anyway, didn’t mean to be such a drag. Texas today looks beautiful, I should probably go outside for some fresh air. You should too.

-IC